"That’s the first doubt crisis—and all of a sudden you’re not as unbelievably in sync as you thought," Batshaw explains.
And then hours later, you start to panic that your interest in someone else means you should jump ship. As long as you don’t send out signals that you’re actually available, harmlessly flirting ain’t a thing, says Emily Brown, a Virginia-based social worker who helps couples navigate sticky relational issues.“At some point, especially in long-term relationships, you’re going to be attracted to other people.” Keep this in mind as well if you learn that your partner was seen flirting with another person.On the other hand, if you get another person’s number and text innuendos back and forth, not saying a thing about it to your boyfriend or girlfriend, that’s not OK.Once you veer into secrecy, you’ve crossed a line, Brown says.Maybe your partner isn’t exactly up to snuff between the sheets.
(It happens.) Sexual compatibility—including the specifics of your desires as well as how often you want to get it on—is a huge factor in couples’ happiness, Batshaw says.
But just because someone isn’t constantly blowing your mind in the bedroom doesn’t mean you should ditch them ASAP, says marriage and family therapist Lisa Bahar.
You’ve met their family, hung out with their friends, and their clothes frequently find their way into your hamper.
for a while now, and things are starting to get serious.
If you haven’t already moved in together, you might be heavily considering it.
But even though you’re definitely in love and enjoy being around your partner, you may have had a few second thoughts about this special someone, wondering if some of their quirks, habits, or parts of their past are red flags. Virtually every paired-up partner has doubts about their significant other at some point along coupledom’s course, says Michael Batshaw, a psychotherapist and author of . Just ask your parents.) In fact, he believes that the real relationship doesn’t begin until the first major disappointment.